Scientists have successfully concluded that 95% of married life is shouting ‘What?’ from other rooms. The other 5% of marriage is actually hearing your partner muttering ‘Doesn’t matter’ at the end of an unsuccessful room-to-room conversation. Professor Brian Bellend who headed up the survey said: “I’ve been married for 17 years now and not a […]
Category Archives: Relationships
A woman who specifically told her husband not to buy her anything for Valentine’s Day has told of her disappointment that her husband didn’t buy her anything for Valentine’s Day. Joan ‘Joan’ Strumpet, 39, told her husband not to spend any money on Valentine’s Day but to put it towards a holiday. Husband Dean didn’t […]
The reason why women take so long doing anything has been revealed in the findings of a new study. The study showed that women take so long doing anything because they’re so fucking slow. Professor CleverClogs of the University of Nowhere in Particular told GrumpyFuckers: “Women take longer because they like to do things properly. […]
A new ruling by the International Court has deemed that two-faced friends should be bitch-slapped twice – one for each face. The new ruling is designed to provide victims of two-faced fuckers with some retribution. A spokesman for the International Court told GrumpyFuckers: “We’ve all been on the receiving end of some two-faced twat. This […]
A man has discovered the Holy Grail of the human psyche – the one thing that turns every woman on. George ‘George’ Simpleton made the discovery by accident when after he had ordered a takeaway from his local Chinese. He told GrumpyFuckers: “I’d cleaned the kitchen before we had takeout but after we’d eaten, there […]
Men are to receive free evening classes to help them decipher women’s non-verbal cues. The announcement was made today by some guy from the government. He told GrumpyFuckers: “Us lads have no idea what women mean when they say stuff. Last night, my missis told me that I was a fat, overpaid twat. I found […]
News, Relationships
Wife who told husband not to buy anything for her birthday disappointed that husband didn’t buy anything for her birthday
15
Feb
Feb
A woman who specifically told her husband not to buy her anything for her birthday has told of her disappointment that her husband didn’t buy her anything for her birthday. Joan ‘Joan’ Strumpet, 39, told her husband not to spend any money on her birthday but to put it towards a holiday. Husband Dean didn’t […]