World Peace Day ruined by asshole with a lawnmower

World Peace Day has officially been ruined by an asshole with a lawnmower.

Local residents were woken at 7.30 this morning by Jimmy Dickface, who was mowing his lawn.

One resident told Grumpy Fuckers:

“I was resting in bed because I’d been up late last night sitting on my husband’s face. I thought I’d be able to get some sleep in the morning because it’s the weekend. But just after 7.30 this morning, Jimmy Dickface gets his lawnmower out and starts trimming his lawn. He’s had all fucking week to do it but he decides to do it when we’re all trying to get some sleep. He spent just 20 minutes mowing his lawn and then fucked off into town while the rest of us couldn’t get back to sleep. If I see Jimmy Dickface around, I’m going to punch him straight in the face. People like him should not be allowed to own a lawnmower and should be punched in the face instead.”

Jimmy’s wife explained his early morning antics:

“Jimmy shat the bed last night so rather than change the sheets, he fucked off and did the lawn instead as it was easier. He’s such a dickface.”

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