Posted on 6 Comments

New coffee range launched for non-morning people

A new range of coffee has been launched for people who don’t like mornings.

Grumpy Fuckers Coffee follows after the successful launch of Grumpy Fuckers Coffee shop in Cardiff. Manager Clive GrimGrits told GrumpyFuckers:

“Our shop has become the number one tourist destination here in Wales since we opened last year. Every morning, we get a load of grumpy-looking fuckers in here so we only thought it right that we launch our very own range of coffee. It means that people don’t even have to leave home to be a grumpy fucker – they can sit at home like a lardarse and be one. We’ve launched our first batch which looks like shit and tastes like shit and we are now looking at expanding our range.”

Customer Terry SourFace said:

“This coffee tastes like horseshit. And I’ve tasted horseshit. I love it.”

Another customer added:

“My life is so shit and this just rounds it off nicely.”

Our Christmas Shop is now open! Click on the image to take a browse!

6 thoughts on “New coffee range launched for non-morning people

  1. Other than traveling to Cardiff , how can I get grumpy fucker coffee making.?

  2. I am looking at a bulk order .Any chance of a discunt (see what i did there )

    1. Possibly. Very clever btw.

  3. I see you took up my suggestion for a new merchandise line. Someone else may have suggested it, but fuck ‘em.

  4. Here’s another suggestion for merchandise. I was looking through the depressing remnants of my younger life ( like I’m not miserable enough), and I found a pin I wore in High School. It stated quite simply, “What part of FUCK OFF, didn’t you understand?” My principle said it shiwed I had a bad attitude. I asked him what was his fucking point? He didn’t appreciate the question. Can’t imagine why.

    1. We’ll look into it!

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