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Silent hairdressers opens for grumpy fuckers who hate small talk

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A silent hairdressers has opened for grumpy fuckers who hate small talk.

Grumpy Fuckers’ Hair Salon opened its doors yesterday and was overwhelmed by demand.

Manager Sheila Fuckwit told Grumpy Fuckers:




“We appreciate that lots of fuckers just want to come in and get their hair cut. We hate talking shit as much as the next person but a lot of the time, we feel that we have to make small talk to cover up the awkward silences. Our salon offers our guests a new experience. We don’t say a fucking word and don’t expect our guests to either. It’s this kind of bespoke yet excellent customer service that makes us stand out from the competition.”

Customers to the salon will be pleased to know that their hairdresser won’t be asking where they’re going on holiday this year.

One customer said:

“I just want to sit on my fat arse and get my shitty hair cut. This place is perfect for me.”

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2 Comments

2 Comments

  1. Dana Kullmann

    August 1, 2017 at 6:20 pm

    I purchased a Grumpy Fuckers coffee cup from you some time ago. It was sent in a box with no packing and of course was shattered when it arrived. I contacted you through email at the time asking how I could get it replaced, never got a response. The USPS Tracking # is 9274 8999 9633 0939 5196 20. There was no other paperwork with the cup so I don’t have anything else to go by. USPS won’t cover it as it was improperly packed. Thank you for any assistance you can give.

    • Royston Butterscotch

      August 3, 2017 at 9:14 pm

      Hi Dana. Do you have the order number? We’ll look into it straight away. Please accept our apologies.

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