News
REVEALED: 10 minutes of work makes you start using the word ‘fuck’ like a comma
Jan
A new survey has revealed that just 10 minutes of work can make people use the word ‘fuck’ as if they were commas.
The research was completed by a team at the University of Grumpy Fucks. They wanted to know why people were using the word so frequently.
Professor FuckFace who led the research, told GrumpyFuckers:
“We found that the workplace is a hotbed for profanity. People can arrive like Mother Theresa and within ten minutes, be at the point of ripping someone’s head off. A lot of it is to do with self-serving managers, who were often referred to as ‘cockwombles’. Other sources of frustration included shit coffee from the vending machine as well as conversations with customers. On one average day in an average workplace, you could expect to hear the word ‘fuck’ more than 20 times a minute. 78% of these expletives are mumbled under people’s breath or behind people’s back and our work was crucial in discovering that.”
Worker Jenny WideFlange, who took part in the survey, said:
“Yeah whatever. Fucking fuck fuck.”
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I love the movie Boondock Saints. The Irish bartender has Tourettes and will at any given time will shout “Fuck! Ass!” So being a grumpy fucker myself I will mumble this whenever my patience is tried unduly.
As a grumpy fucking nurse I can confirm this. I mutter “fuck” under my breath twice as often when my patient is a grumpy fucker.
Fuck that shit.
A sweary fucking nurse? What is this world coming to?
Really??? You’ve obviously never been a nurse. They put up with a lot of fucking shit!!
Quite literally.
This is fucking bullshit!!!!
I usually utter my first “fuck” of the shift about 5 minutes after it starts.
Seriously I starting saying FUCK when I had to start getting ready for work! Then again driving to fucking work! Then again when I got into the fucking parking lot! Then walking into fucking work! And after that I lost count! I’m sure I averaged at least a
100 fucks a day!!!!!! I really didn’t give 2 fucks about that job!!!
This is probably far more prevalent with those who work in phone rooms. A more thankless job there is not on planet Earth!
i fucking LOVE this…
The fucking woman I work with has many fucking variations of ‘fuck’ . “Fucking little fuck-witted fuckwad stumblefuck!” , was one of her fucking best, hurled at the fucking fuckstick we have to fucking work with. Fucking classic! Can’t fucking wait for her fucking next one. It usally takes her less than 10 minutes to let the fuck loose. I pretty much walk in motherfucking the world. Oh well. FUCK IT!
So I’m in a fucking airport…so what in the fuck happened with people not checking their fucking luggage?! I fly Southwest a lot…to all you fuckers that don’t either read or give a fuck…your fucking bags fly free you stupid mother fuckers!!! But no, you arrogant fucks hold up getting on the plane and getting off the plane because you are all fucktards!!! Anyway, I’m about to board and probably say fuck at least 10 times in the next 3 minutes…stupid fucks.
The fucks start before I even open my eyes ESPECIALLY weekdays oh on Saturdays not fo
rgetting Sundays a day of rest my arse
I teach high school and waitress so I’m surrounded by the word fuck all day, not always my own. Teens apparently love the fuck out of the word fuck because they use it every fucking chance they get. There is no fucking creativity, no care for fucking syntax, just shove FUCK any ol’ where in a sentence as they whine, complaining they ran out of fucking Roblox money, or they didn’t get their fucking vegan hummus smoothie this morning or some shit. Like everything else in their privileged, entitled, little fucktard brains, they haven’t yet come to appreciate the word because it was never not okay to say it. Nobody got their mouths washed out with fucking nasty ass Dial soap for saying as kids. Nobody got their asses tore the fuck up for saying it at church or family gatherings. If anything, their little baby fuck slips were laughed at, then made into a fucking tikkety gram or instafok which did nothing but give them a fucking glimpse of the fuckity gloriousness of the word, without any substance. But that’s my job and why I mumble fucks all day, just waiting for my last day before glorious ducking retirement, when I get to stand in the hall with all those ungrateful little fuckfaces and yell “FUCK YOU, YOU FUCKING FUCKS!!!”
Nah, I love my job and those crazy little fuck stains
At approximately 4:15am I mutter my first fuck. My sweet orange tabby Cooper, starts banging cabinet doors to be fed. As my eyes open it’s stop fucking doing that Coop”! Cats fed. Fuck it’s 5am . I might as well get a fucking shower and get ready. Walking out the door it’s “FUCK ITS COLD”! Driving to work…”come’on the fucking light is green”! Walking into work I hear myself say “I’m so fucking tired of winter. I’ll be glad when I can move the fuck out of Illinois (Chicago suburb) back down to Florida. Then my assistant manager starts her yapping and I just want to say ‘shut the fuck up’!! Leaving after 11 hrs I hear that voice say ‘ fuck I’m glad this day is over’. Get home and Cooper and his baby sister are yelling ‘ where the fuck have you been? We are fucking hungry’! My answer is ‘I’m sorry babies but if you want a warm house and great food then shut the fuck up! I’m getting it!!! Then crawling back in bed and just before my eyes slam shut I hear it….here it comes… ‘fuck I’m tired’!
Fuck for fucking fuck’s sake! You fucking people are fucking amafuckingtuers! If you fuckwits can’t fucking interfuckingject at least four fucking fucks in a single fucking sentence, you fucking need to learn from a profuckingfessional! It’s not fucking hard you weak fucking fucknuts! Fucking fucktards every fucking one of you fucks! I fucking start my shitfuck job at 5 the fuck AM!! It’s now fucking 11 fucking 30! How the many fucks do you fucksticks think I’ve fucking fucked by now?? FUCK OFF!
Grumpy in fucking Illinois!
True is true,FFS.