A 32 year-old worker has spent another day not using the algebra he was taught at school.
Neville Dickforbrains spent three years learning algebra at school before getting himself a job as a council worker. To date, he has spent 14 year and 3 months not using mathematical symbols and the rules for manipulating these symbols thereof.
Dickforbrains told Grumpy Fuckers:
“I learnt loads of stuff in school – algebra was the big one. My maths teacher told me that I might need to use it if I was to become an astronaut or something. I’ve seen Apollo 13 but that’s as far as I got to being an astronaut. For more than 14 years now, I’ve never had to use the knowledge I spent three years learning at school. I also learnt a shitload of Shakespeare stuff. The only thing I remember was that his wife was Britain’s first Avon lady.”
Neville’s school friend Terry Blundergunt was called to use algebra when he appeared on a TV quiz show. Sadly, he got the answer wrong because he’s a thick shit and we sent home empty-handed.